I would like to step away from the writing prompts this week… There is still a couple of these prompts left, as they were originally meant to be used for the first week of blogging, for writing mini-posts daily… But, as you could see, that worked out a bit differently in my case.
Writing with prompts appeared to be relatively easy, because the prompts so far focused on questions that are quite common. What I mean by “common” is that most of us have already thought (well, at least tried to think) about these questions. Most of us already have an opinion, or at least have collected some ideas on these topics. Thus, I could just explore and express my opinion, you could take a look at it through the perspective of yours and immediately see whether it resonates, whether it seems to make sense or appears to be stupid based on the dissonance of our views.
In contrast to the prompts, when I want to write about something specific to me and my life, to open up in a new way – that’s where the real challenge begins. Because I know that you have no experience of my inner world. As with any other writing, I am going to have the difficulties with expressing myself, to be caused by my internal resistance. However, when sharing something truly deep and personal, I also need to find, present, explain the common points of reference in the outer world… the points to which you, my dear reader, could relate. (Well… at least, that might be what often runs somewhere at the back of my mind)
Let me explain it from a different perspective. If I’d write jibberish (i.e. use mixtures of letters which aren’t present in common dictionaries), it might or might not make sense to me (mind games?) but, most likely, won’t make any sense to anyone else. Not the intended sense anyway. Describing my inner world in plain words is actually very much like that. Without common points of reference, I can’t convey the message. Without these points, my words would either make no sense, or the perceived sense could be anywhere from fairly close to unexpectedly far away from the intended one – and sharing with such uncertainty and lack of control is not a good thing for a message.
There is a thought, a saying that our deepest pain may be our highest blessing. My soul-friend Sasha Martin called such a thing from her experience “anguish” (I first heard Sasha at WDS2013 and connected with her at WDS2014; she details her story in her book “Life From Scratch”). Napoleon Hill devotes a chapter in his “Think and Grow Rich” to the story of his son and how they turned around a physical disability into an advantage. One of Jack Canfield’s writing teachers used to say that continuously searching for some book without finding it it often an indicator, a sign of having that book inside of us…
And so it is with many events in our lives. Something happens that feels unpleasant, uncomfortable, disappointing in the moment when it appears, and out of the context seems to be “certainly bad” – but in fact, many of such things actually bring uniqueness to our life experience, which, in turn, brings uniqueness to us. And being unique is a key to becoming irreplaceable, to finding something that only you and no one else could do. Which is equivalent to finding your life’s purpose. All these things are interconnected (well, in my view, everything is interconnected ;) ). Somebody even wrote “All happy families are similar, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way” – which again speaks of the uniqueness of “negative” experiences (and who decides on the labels, by the way?)
I also clearly hear mentions of the divide in the Teachings of Abraham: “Every subject is really two subjects, something wanted and the absence of it (aka something unwanted)”. They use a metaphor of a stick with two very different ends. You can choose the end which you hold on to, but when you pick up the stick, you take them both. The life is the same: it is always up to us to choose which side of the divide we decide to focus upon (no arguing, the choice can be very hard to make), but you can’t have one without the other.
In these terms, pain and uniqueness are two ends of the same stick. And don’t get me wrong, it’s not necessarily physical or emotional pain. By “pain” I mean all discomfort, irritation, anger that we experience. The pain is a natural by-product of being alive & being human.
In this mini-series of posts, I would like to tell you about my deepest pain in life – which can be/become my greatest strength as well. And it is… love.
Have something to share? Say it in the comments!
You can also subscribe to the blog updates.