A couple of days ago, I encountered a very special girl… I haven’t spoken up to her, I am not yet ready to speak up to such people. But observing her made something in my mind click.
You see, she was DIFFERENT. She was radiating kindness. Physically, she looked around my age. A couple of years yonger or older, probably. But energetically she was of an undefined age. She was keeping a child inside her alive (maybe even more alive than herself, actually). And that kindness and love that she radiated were outside of any age limits.
And when I say “DIFFERENT” about people, it usually means that such people would be commonly labeled as either freaks or retarted. But I don’t care about labels. For me it is more important that these people stand out of the crowd, they live their uniqueness, either by choice or by a matter of fact.
And this is what I realized.
I have been looking for friends for quite a while. At least since I moved to Germany. Maybe even longer.
People often tell me something like, “Hey, I know such a person and he/she is this and that and that”. Russian. Programmer. Photographer. Musician. Something that they could tell about me, and they think I would be interested in meeting and learning any other person who does something similar.
Not quite right. I am not looking for musicians, photographers, writers or software engineers, not just for anybody who engages in certain activities from time to time (even if it’s every day of the week).
Who I am looking for are people that live and breathe through their craft. Who create because they enjoy it, because they love it, because they they want to make other people awed, astonished, mindful, happier… Because that’s who they are.
I am looking for bright creative individuals. The truth is, everybody can be bright and creative. Each of us is unique. But most of us don’t understand, are afraid of, or prefer not to open to their uniqueness. And I am looking for those who are ready. Who are starting to embrace their uniqueness and express it, share it with the world, or maybe even have been doing it for a while already.
I am looking for love and kindness in people. But many still think that agression is an essential part of relationships, and I… I would say that what might be necessary is challenges. The “juice” of relatioships is in learning another person and supporting them in living a richer life. When things get plain and boring – it is a warning signal. But I believe that there are enough challenges in life to get by without a direct confrontation of friends over some miserably small matter. Go travel, for example. To a totally new country. There will be enough difficult situations to keep the excitement high. I can’t really stand people being childishly offensive or defensive. I think they are missing on life while doing that.
At the moment, I can name a few people special to me who I have already found. And again, there are, there could be many more people doing similar things as my friends (some of whom I haven’t yet met), but it is not only WHAT, it is HOW and especially WHY that matters to me.
Jolie Guillebeau – Artist. Painter. A beautiful and inspiring woman.
Kate Marolt – Playful Warrior, as she calls herself. Kate’s all things health and play. Yoga, movement, travels into amazing nature. Warning: her energy is contagious! :D
Nadja Petranovskaja – Happiness Builder :) Focusing on Germany (which is a tough challenge, IMHO). With a mission to help 5 million people to be happy, Nadja is working on bringing more shiny eyes to the world, and she is a wonderful person to be around. Connector. Entrepreneur. Experimenter. Muse.
Naz – she focuses on creating ripples of positive change in the world from Australia. And at WDS I have learned how Naz can literally lose herself in a tough challenge if there is a chance to help a friend. An incredibly lovely lady, and a truly supportive friend.
Nik – my dear friend and mentor, very light and optimistic man. I keep referring people to his TEDx talk from which it all had started for me: after that talk, I reached out to Nik and asked for MORE :) Because I felt that through him I might get to the life I desired – and that feeling appeared to be 100% right. Nik introduced me to a few wonderful sources of positivity and well-being (e.g. The Teachings of Abraham), and has been supporting me in the challenging periods of my life, simply by showing me the right direction to return back on track.
And there are two people who I feel quite a bit uncomfortable to put on this list… becase they are incredibly successful in my field, in music. They are widely known in the whole world: Amy Lee of Evanescence, and Jared Leto of Thirty Seconds to Mars.
I don’t know much about them, because the most public part of their life is their music. But I feel it, through the music, through their live concerts, through their appearances in the media: they are ARTISTS. They create for the sake of art, of music, of self-expression. And they are unique, and they are authentic, and they are DIFFERENT beyond measures :)
Even more uncomfortable and difficult for me is to say the following. What I am looking in others, this description of an “ideal friend” for me… I believe that it is based on the highest knowledge, the highest vision of my own self. I know that at the moment I am still not embracing myself that much, and I want to connect and become a friend of people who will remind me and show me how I can do it, how I can…. fully be myself.
What is important to YOU in your (future) friends? How much resemblance do you see in them with your own self, your values and beliefs? Please take a minute to share it with us in the comments!